Tower Tarot Card Love Meaning

What does the Tower tarot card mean in a Love reading?

Is the Tower a bad tarot card to get in a question about your love life?

In this series of posts, I am doing about the Tarot cards and their love meanings I usually start by asking: Is this card a good card to get in a love reading? This time, around I asked: Is the Tower a bad card to get? I didn’t ask if it is a good card to get, because when you get the Tower most people will assume the worst. It is a dark card and it shakes people up just looking at it. So when it turns up as a final card when you are asking about love and relationship you might be asking yourself; How bad is it?

The Tower often shows up when something has come to a completion, but the seeker is too invested to be able to let it go. In a love reading, the seeker might be unable to handle the realities of the relationship they are in. They might not be very compatible with their love interest OR they themselves have some behaviour they are unable to face. When reality hits it can come as a shock, however, it is necessary for the seeker’s highest good. The relationship might even benefit once the emotional turmoil has been dealt with.

Learn the traditional meaning of the Tower tarot card here. 

In my experience with the Tower, it always shows up to push the seeker in the right direction. In many ways, it is like the Wheel of Fortune tarot card. When the Wheel turns the seeker ends up expanding towards their destiny. The Tower tarot card kind of pushes you there, against your wishes, by getting rid of all the things you think you need; which ultimately were only a distraction. The walls we build around ourselves come crashing down under the lightning strikes of the Tower. It might feel like you are left abandoned which couldn’t be further from the truth. You are being rescued. There are new situations and relationships to be had, but they were not to be found in your tower. The Tower had to throw you out so that the life you are meant to lead can catch you.

If you are in a relationship and the Tower shows up you might find out something about your partner that shocks you. You might even realize you are not very compatible. Most likely you are arguing and stirring emotional pain up in each other. You can either deal with your issues and grow as a couple, or you can separate to find out what you need.

If you are single and the Tower shows up in a reading you might have to face some truth about why love seems to elude you. In most cases it is fear of abandonment. Let go of your fear of rejection and you will find that the dating scene has a lot to offer you.

Tower Tarot Card Love Meaning summary

The Tower shows up in our love readings when we need to face our emotional fears and pain. Your partner might be the one triggering these issues in you, OR you find out something about your relationship that will change it forever. If you are single the Tower can be a sign that dating is a painful experience and you might want to avoid it all together. Rid yourself of your emotional fears and abandonment issues and your love life will blossom like you could never believe. 

2016-09-21T16:10:29+00:00 January 31st, 2015|Major Arcana, Tarot cards and Love Meanings|61 Comments

About the Author:

Hi, I am Inger, I run TarotWikipedia an online free tarot and rune database and reading tutorials site.Connect with Inger on Google+

61 Comments

  1. Tatyana March 31, 2016 at 10:51 pm

    I pulled The Tower for a daily love single-card card reading. Because it filled me with the feeling of distress, I pulled another card, and got the Lovers with the interpretation of choices. How should I read these? : (

  2. Inger Bråthen April 1, 2016 at 3:34 pm

    Hi Tatyana. The Tower card has that effect on people…they feel stressed just looking at this card, however without the shake-up of the Tower we could easily get stuck, and our experiences one dimensional. The Tower is showing up to shake up your world and bring out possibilities that otherwise would remain hidden. In your case it has to do with your Love life, and being in the best relationship you can be in …. The Tower has different meanings for singles or people in relationships. If you are single The Tower will stir up beliefs and programs blocking a soulmate coming in, and when these feelings are stirred up you can face them head on…thus free yourself….:)
    Love Ingie

  3. Alexis June 12, 2016 at 11:13 pm

    Hello, recently I broke up with my boyfriend and I made a three card reading asking about how our relationship will evolve and I’ve pulled in past = lovers reversed, presente = justice reverse and future = the tower, this last card is confusing me and I’m not sure if it means that it’s completely over due to how negative the other cards are. Thanks for your answer

  4. Inger Bråthen June 14, 2016 at 9:19 pm

    Hi, Alexis. I believe the card are telling you the lesson in this relationship is self-love, so focus on the relationship with self is the key.

  5. Michael November 16, 2016 at 4:46 am

    Hi Inger, I pulled a 3 card spread for the week for a love reading on my girlfriend on her feelings towards me. We are in the middle of a working things out situation. knight of swords, knight of wands and tower. Thanks

  6. Inger Bråthen November 16, 2016 at 3:10 pm

    Hi, Michael. This is a very passionate relationship. The tower can mean there is almost too much passion, and it can lead to breakdown in communication. The more fun you have, the better for this relationship. This is a relationship that is meant to be lived in the fast lane 🙂

  7. Alyssa November 21, 2016 at 4:39 pm

    Hi Inger
    I had a Celtic cross reading done recently and it had the tower in the final outcome position. normally, I see the tower and panic, that was my first reaction.. But after reflecting on it, I’m thinking it may just mean drastic change…The person interpreting my cards saw it as a warning. Here are my other cards and their positions.. do you have an opinion you could give me on this?
    1- 6 of pentacles
    2- king of cups
    3- page of rods
    4- queen of rods
    5- 6 of swords
    6- 3 of pentacles
    7- 8 of swords
    8- lovers
    9- 10 of rods
    10- tower
    Thanks, Alyssa

  8. Inger Bråthen November 21, 2016 at 7:39 pm

    Hi, Alyssa. I find that the Tower often shows up when we are on an emotional rollercoaster. You are getting a lot of court cards, so it could relate to tension between people…

  9. Jade December 6, 2016 at 3:14 am

    Hi Inger,

    I am having a tumultuous relationship with a separated man, and on the verge of breaking up, but really am finding it hard to give up, and am feeling inclined to take a break. We’ve been together more than a year. I love him, but it is very hard. I did a five card love potential drawing which went
    1) how he sees me and soul lessons he learns from me
    2) how i see him and soul lessons I learn from him
    3) emotional future with him, whether I’ll be happy, what I want and challenges that I will face
    4) his emotional future with me, potential for me to make him happy, and what he wants and possible challenges for him
    5) greater potential of the relationship, outcome or soul lesson that we would work through or experience together.

    I drew
    1. Temperance
    2. Strength
    3. The Tower
    4. The Judgment
    5. The High Priestess

    Can you help me understand? I’m definitely nervous about the Tower and coming to terms that I amy have to seek a permanent end, but is there any potential for maybe a 1 -2 month break instead? Is there hope for the relationship even though I know some big obstacles lie in the way. Thanks!

    Jade

  10. Inger Bråthen December 6, 2016 at 7:07 pm

    Hi, Jade. Did you use the whole deck, or only the Major Arcana cards? The tower in emotional future could mean there is an emotional rollercoaster with this person which can be hard to cope with, especially if you are a sensitive person.

  11. Jade December 6, 2016 at 8:19 pm

    Dear Inger,

    I used the entire deck and shuffled it. Then I cut it into three separate piles with my left hand, and chose one of the piles to draw my five cards from. When I drew my cards, only the Major Arcana cards came up, which is kind of unique because I usually get a mix. Does this have some sort of meaning?

    Jade

  12. Inger Bråthen December 7, 2016 at 5:10 am

    Hi, Jade. Yes it does have a lot of meaning when only the major arcanas show up 🙂 It means you both feel the situation is beyond your control. However, I feel you have been given time now to focus on what you really want, and to manifest what you want. The high priestess in outcome or soul lesson, I feel, is you showing each other what you want and need in a relationship. I feel like you are each other’s teachers in this regard 🙂

  13. Jade December 7, 2016 at 8:36 am

    Hey again Inger,

    Thanks so much for the response! I see what you are saying, and I will try to lick my wounds and truly take this opportunity to think about what I truly want. I am just wondering how the High Priestess card is still relevant even if we are no longer seeing each other? We haven’t completely split yet, but how can that High Priestess card be effective if we basically have to separate. Can lessons be that short term, or is it like we will eventually hit some revelation on our own due to our past connection?

    Also, I am concerned about how he handles the Judgment card. I think bc the his current ties need to be carefully considered, it may be a long time before he is truly free. And judgement seems to be about going back and dealing with your past, however long that may take. Is that his lesson to learn with that card? As you can see, the last 3 cards have me a bit confused. :] / : z

  14. Inger Bråthen December 7, 2016 at 3:43 pm

    The High priestess is very relevant when a couple is not physically together because it speaks of relationships that are very much on a psychic level. You might find that you still have a strong connection even if you don’t spend a lot of time together.

  15. Jade December 9, 2016 at 7:08 am

    Thank you, Inger. : ]

  16. Georgina December 30, 2016 at 12:42 pm

    Hi Inger, I received The Tower when asking for a reading of how a particular friend views me/our friendship. What does this mean?

  17. Inger Bråthen January 1, 2017 at 8:21 am

    Hi, Georgina. This person could be going through some emotional upset, and maybe they are feeling unsure about the future of the friendship.

  18. Georgina January 1, 2017 at 11:17 am

    Thank you Inger 🙂

  19. Monica January 1, 2017 at 9:56 pm

    Hej Inger, jag har lagt Celtic cross love spread. Fick på utgången kort 10,11,12: tower reversed,Queen of swords upright and 4 of swords upright. Tacksam för stöd att tolka de tre ihop.

  20. Inger Bråthen January 3, 2017 at 11:45 pm

    Hei, Monica. Det kan bety at dere unngår en krise ved å kommunisere noe viktig på en voksen og moden måte.

  21. Marelyn Colon January 6, 2017 at 5:50 am

    I got
    The tower
    The sun reversed
    The devil reversed
    King of wands
    Any idea what this could mean in matters of love with my current hearts pursuit?

  22. Inger Bråthen January 7, 2017 at 7:23 am

    Hi, Marelyn. This card combination could mean you are holding back falling head over heels because you might feel a bit unsure about the future.

  23. Izabella January 9, 2017 at 2:53 pm

    Hi Inger!

    So about a month ago the guy I fell in love with and I ended things. We have been working on being friends but to me the relationship feels unfinished. I asked the cards on what is happening between us and I got:

    1. Temperance
    2. The Moon
    3. The Hanged Man
    4. The Sun
    5. Strength
    6. The Tower

    What do you think this means?

  24. Inger Bråthen January 9, 2017 at 3:05 pm

    Hi, Izabella. This card combination can mean this person is letting you wait and he is not completely honest with where you stand with each other. The tower indicates you will soon find out the truth, and then you will be able to focus on your bright future.

  25. Izabella January 9, 2017 at 3:15 pm

    That’s really interesting because he ended things quite abruptly, out of the blue and said that he wasn’t sure of his feelings and felt like he lost them. And now that we are being just friends, to me it feels like there is still something there. Thank you!

  26. Tarot February 2, 2017 at 2:02 am

    Hi i got the tower card when i asked if i will get enegaged to my boyfriend by may does this mean a no or does this mean we will break up ?

  27. Inger Bråthen February 4, 2017 at 3:54 pm

    The tower can mean the time is not yet ripe to get engaged.

  28. anonymous February 9, 2017 at 9:51 pm

    Hi I pulled out a page of wands followed by tower my question was will I b able to move to Delhi and will I b successful in both work and love life as I will v moving for a job vd my bf

  29. Inger Bråthen February 11, 2017 at 2:52 pm

    This card combination can mean there will be a bit of drama on your path. I feel like the tower is describing you feeling emotional upheaval in the beginning of your transition, and then I can see you being very successful.

  30. PS February 17, 2017 at 7:21 am

    Hi Inger,

    Hope you’re well. I’ve been single for a while and I’m very open to meet someone special. I think I’m getting anxious (maybe) my biological clock is ticking and most importantly I believe in companionship and would like to be with one.
    I did a Decans taort spread – When will I find my man
    and the four cards I got was
    The Tower, The Magician, Strength, and The Lovers.

    Just wondering what does this means; would you be able to guide me on this please.

    Many thanks

  31. Inger Bråthen February 18, 2017 at 7:55 am

    Hi 🙂 I believe you will meet someone special when you least expect it. I laid out some cards for you and they showed me 5-6 months from now.

  32. ps February 18, 2017 at 8:56 am

    Thank you, Inger 🙂

  33. Tatjana February 22, 2017 at 7:39 pm

    Hi Inger!
    Can you please help me understand this reading. I broke up with my boyfriend and after that tried to get back together but he was upset and asked me some time to think things through. He has some major issues he is dealing with (we met at psychiatric) and he is trying to resolve them (anger issues as well). We were so much in love and he proposed me. So this change in his behavior came to me as a shock. So, right now we are 8 months apart and he doesn’t call me or anything (but he promised to clear some things). At first I was trying to help and stayed close to him but last 2 months I gave up. He is not feeling well and I decided to let things go how they are supposed to. All is left is hope. My friend drew celtic cross for me asking will we get back together. The cards were:
    1.) Star 2.) Lovers 3.) 10 of wands 4.) 10 of pentacles 5.) Ace of pentacles
    6.) 10 of cups 7.) 5 of pentacles 8.) 7 of pentacles 9.) 8 of cups 10.) the tower

    I had similar reading with 8 of pentacles, 5 of cups, prince of cups, 10 of pentacles, 4 of swords, hierophant, 2 of swords, temperance, 6 of cups and tower at the end.

    Does it mean that I will finally know what happened? He will came from the blue and explain what had happened? That the truth will set me free? Or he completely gave up on everything?

  34. Inger Bråthen February 23, 2017 at 2:29 pm

    Dear, Tatjana. Your cards indicate that you have spiritual gifts and that there is also a career path you should focus on that will bring you a lot of meaning and fulfillment in life. The tower indicates that you the situation with your ex spiraled you towards your spiritual gifts and also your purpose in this lifetime. With your spiritual gifts you need to also be careful to be around people with high vibration. If your ex currently has a lower vibration than you, then he will be blocked from contacting you, as your energy can be harmed. Be discerning on who you let close. Just as he needs to let his anger issues go, it will be wise if you let him go for now. Now you are growing into you who you are meant to be. In the future, there will be good news and you will resolve your doubts, and any pain you have had in this matter will dissolve. Your perfect match will cross your path as you live your destiny.

  35. RR March 5, 2017 at 7:51 am

    Hi there, Inger! Thank you so much for writing this article!

    When I asked how the relationship between my crush and me is going to develop over the next two months, I pulled The Tower and the Nine of Pentacles. What could this mean?

  36. Inger Bråthen March 7, 2017 at 9:44 am

    The tower with nine of pentacles can mean you will quickly move on from this crush.

  37. Nle March 30, 2017 at 4:10 am

    Hi Inger,

    I recently got reading where it was mainly about my relationship and how its been turbulent . It spoke of a breakup and the final card was the tower.

    The reader said if i were to break up i need to do it in a gentle manner and that he might not take it so well. However my boyfriend is the one who brings up breaking up when ever we argue.

    Ihave thought long and hard about the break up due to his anger issues. But something deep down feels like breaking up isn’t right. He’s not a bad guy and tries to handle his emotions, even the reader said that as well.

    After the tower he got a card that he said represents healing and after that a card that he said symbolized another card reader and spoke of my mom and needing help to heal. But all i can think about is the relationship really not meant to be. Everytime i get a reading ppl say im gifted and intuitive. But i never know whats my emotions or what’s intuition.

  38. Inger Bråthen April 1, 2017 at 4:13 am

    Hi, many intuitive people end up in very turbulent relationships which can be so difficult for an intuitive to handle. You are a sensitive person so his anger issues will really affect you on a deep level. I can tell you are a person who really believes in a commitment. Maybe he can get some help for his anger issues?

  39. Phillipa Cardoso April 2, 2017 at 1:50 pm

    Hello* My question is of a truly personal and emotional matter:
    A couple of weeks ago, I did a simple reading for a very dear family member. The outcome/future card was the Queen of Cups.. and I proceeded to pull a Clarifier, which was the Tower in Reverse.
    It was a general reading, so I interpreted it intuitively & according to recent occurings. The thing is, about 2 nights ago, she dreamt of her deceased husband coming to pay her a visit… and today she had a fall, hurt herself and is in the hospital awaiting surgery. 🙁
    What I would like to know is, will she be okay? And what the according insight would be for these two cards appearing together??
    Very grateful In advance* Namaste!

  40. Inger Bråthen April 3, 2017 at 2:20 am

    Tower reversed often shows up when disaster is avoided and this can mean that her fall could have been a lot more serious, even though she did get hurt, it could have been worse. Queen of cups shows up when we are at our most psychic, and she did see her husband in a dream. I do believe she has opened up more psychically and this experience can very well keep opening up her psychic channels. That often happens when people go through these events. 🙂

  41. Nell April 16, 2017 at 11:37 pm

    Hi, Inger! I drew celtic cross spread on a question how he feels about me and the outcome was Tower. I clarified it with High Priestess then Four of Swords. Will he learn some secret and then take a pause?or it is something different? I am confused since in the spread there were positive cards…

  42. Inger Bråthen April 17, 2017 at 7:03 am

    Hi, I feel he might be having some secrets, and I feel he is worried you will find out.

  43. AS April 19, 2017 at 9:37 pm

    hi Ingie
    when asked about feelings about my partner towards me I got the king of wands and also tower.

    what does this mean. does tower mean he is angry with me or done with me?

  44. AS April 19, 2017 at 11:47 pm

    hi Inger
    me and my partner had major disagreements very catostrophic and broke up. I basically messed up. we have not spoken since January this year

    I asked whether the relationship is over and I got the following:

    Tower
    Temperence
    Two of Swords
    Moon

    what does that mean? can you please guide me

  45. Inger Bråthen April 20, 2017 at 1:21 am

    Hi, it can mean there are lies and deception in this relationship and the best thing you can do is to be patient and not make any major decisions at this point. You can also pray to see the truth about this relationship and to receive guidance what you best can do to have a happy future.

  46. AS April 20, 2017 at 3:27 am

    thanks Inger,

    I broke up with him as I suspected he was cheating on me. but from the cards I received I was not sure if this is permanent break up?

    do you think is already the end or I need to just wait it for now and see what happens?

    My gut feeling and what I have seen so far made me convinced that he is seeing someone else too. but the cards I got for what relationship he has with the other girl are:
    3 of pentacles- past
    Hanged Man – present
    8 of pentacles- future
    I was told these are only work cards and nothing romantic between them. My intuition tells me different so I am not sure what to believe any more. most of the readers have told me there is nothing but I am not sure…. can you pull a card? any advise on how to handle this?

  47. Inger Bråthen April 20, 2017 at 11:27 am

    It can mean you need to work at this relationship to make it work. Hanged man is asking you to take a break and focus on self-love.

  48. As April 20, 2017 at 9:25 pm

    Inger for my relationship when I asked whether it is over or not I got the below. I know you mentioned there is lies and dishonesty in the relationshio and you asked me not to take any major decision at this time. but I wanted to know if this meant th at the relationship is OVER or not certain yet with the moon card?

    Tower
    Temperence
    Two of Swords
    Moon

  49. Inger Bråthen April 24, 2017 at 11:08 am

    It is not completely over, no…. you must look after yourself, though…. take care of yourself first….

  50. AS April 25, 2017 at 1:29 am

    thank you – we are seprated at this time and have no contact. so this space is helping me getting me back on my feet and healing. can you explain what the cards mean in my situation

  51. Tarot May 10, 2017 at 12:58 pm

    Hi i am really confused with my reading i asked a question if my friend would get married to the proposal he had in hand for an arranged marraige and i got the tower sun and justice what does this mean

  52. Inger Bråthen May 11, 2017 at 7:16 am

    Hi. It can mean yes and it will be upsetting at first, but then it will work out and become a balanced relationship.

  53. Tarot May 11, 2017 at 1:00 pm

    Thank you so much you have been so accruate in your response i had one more question what is the best spread to follow to find out when will you marry if you are in a relationship and how often can you do the reading ?

  54. Inger Bråthen May 14, 2017 at 12:37 pm

    You can do a timing of even…pull one card per month. Look for cards like three of cups, the hierophant, and four of wands 🙂

  55. Annie May 18, 2017 at 2:20 am

    Hi Inger,
    I’m single and I recently did a spread asking if I was ever going to find someone. I got Death, The Star, Justice, The Devil, The Chariot and as an outcome, The Tower. Is this a good reading to get? A couple of months ago I was talking with this man I liked, nothing serious, just talking on the phone or texts, but then something happened and I haven’t talked to him anymore. I do admit I sometimes think about him. What do you think? 🙂

  56. Inger Bråthen May 18, 2017 at 3:54 pm

    Did you use the whole deck or only the major arcana cards? I recommend using the ‘who is my soulmate’ tarot spread…
    Card 1: Situation

    Card 2: Hidden influences, secrets

    Card 3: Past life connection with Soulmate

    Card 4: Family and friend connection with Soulmate. Look for court cards. Major Arcana cards denote you will meet through destiny rather than through other people.

    Card 5: Where is your Soulmate

    Card 6: Who is your Soulmate, this is the most revealing card.

    Card 7: Destiny of relationship. If you get a negative card here you can change your destiny by changing beliefs and thoughts about yourself and about your relationship.

  57. Annie May 18, 2017 at 6:32 pm

    I did an online reading that had only major arcanas.

  58. Inger Bråthen May 19, 2017 at 1:48 pm

    Hi, Annie. Have you got a deck of cards? It works better if you shuffle and cut the deck, using your energy 🙂

  59. Annie May 23, 2017 at 7:00 pm

    Hi Inger,
    Sorry for the belated response, but I had some trouble with my internet connection. No, I haven’t tried it with a deck of cards…does it work with normal playing cards or does it need to be tarot cards?

  60. Inger Bråthen May 25, 2017 at 8:22 am

    You can use a normal deck of playing cards as they convert to tarot cards. Here is the link how to do that: http://www.tarotwikipedia.com/read-tarot-with-playing-cards/

  61. Annie June 3, 2017 at 11:18 pm

    Hi Inger,
    I did the spread you suggested and got the following:
    Card 1 Ace of Spades
    Card 2 Ten of Spades
    Card 3 Knight of Diamonds
    Card 4 Ten of Diamonds
    Card 5 Seven of Clubs
    Card 6 Knight of Spades
    Card 7 Queen of Hearts
    Is this a good reading?

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